Monday, October 26, 2009

Creative Ennui

I've got the blahs. The "i don't wanna sew ANYTHING" blahs. It comes on me from time to time--hard to imagine but true. I go from constantly drawing patterns in my head all day, getting fabric inspiration from random tv shows and counting the minutes until my son goes down for his nap so that i can dash downstairs and create to, "eh, maybe later." I suppose its just a block. A sewing block.

I think this is due to a string of sewing disappointments. Projects for myself and friends where the image in my head just didn't match the actual project. Frankly, it makes me feel like one of the bottom three on Project Runway, just moments away from being "auf"-ed. (ANd has anyone even noticed that she's pigeon toed? It bugs me every week.) And my current project?--pissin' me off. It's as if my mojo has left me, and i'm havin' a tough time finding it again.

Of course, with any creative endeavor, the key is to get back on the horse. But like any creative block, you don't want to. Better to wallow, i suppose, than to create another failure. (failure! Like 90% of people even noticed the problems--criminey!) It's as if every time i step into my studio, I am expecting Michael Kors to pop out of the shadow and tell me, with his fake tan and smarmy sneer, that my work looks like a baboon's ass. And i would just sit there and nod, thinking, yes, yes it does, and baboon is sooooo last year...

AHH! Where is the passion i had 0nly a few months ago?

I know in time, this will pass, and i will once again be living in my studio--just in time for the rain/flood season, no doubt. But until then, i am endeavoring to push through, forcing myself to get down there for at least an hour a day to do SOMETHING--even if it is make the ugliest Halloween costume ever.

Shut-up Kors!